There are plenty of horror stories among the newly single about divorce. For those brave enough to be honest, forthright, and equitable, there is an alternative means of severing the marriage bond which doesn't have to involve a protracted legal battle. Divorce mediation allows couples to come to a legally binding agreement which both divides marital assets and dissolves the union, but there are a few things you and your spouse need to determine first, before you start down this road.
Attitude Is Everything
If you and your spouse can't be frank and honest when discussing your marriage in real and legitimate terms then you're already off to a poor start. Mediation requires that both parties be willing to negotiate from equal positions, and without being able to come to an agreement that the marriage needs to end first you'll have a hard time dealing with some of the more difficult topics. Can you bite your tongue when what you really want is to sling insults and cause pain?
Having the right attitude going into a divorce mediation will make all the difference in the world. Be ready to disclose any assets you may have in your own name, and be willing to accept revelations of the same from your spouse. Try not to take anything that's revealed during mediation personally, and you'll stand a fair chance of finding enough common ground upon which to come to an agreement.
In the same way that you need to be honest about real estate, personal property, investments, and businesses, you also need to be honest about what you want from any marital assets. If you want shared ownership in a business you helped build, speak up, but be willing to negotiate on that point. Don't just sit back and accept whatever scraps your spouse chooses to leave you, especially if you provided measurable support in a venture, or put time, effort, or money into the purchase of property.
When children are involved the entire process of mediation becomes more challenging, which is why many couples bring in an advocate for their children too. Be open and honest about the kind of custody arrangement you want, but again it's important that you be ready to adjust those expectations based on your spouse's needs and desires. Further, take into account what will be in the best interests of your child, rather than placing undue burdens on a minor.
If you're willing to work for it, a mediated divorce can provide a far more fulfilling result than any court order. Mediation doesn't work for everyone though, so be honest with yourself first. For more information, talk to a professional like Life Coaching and Counseling of Dallas.Share