If you're having trouble working through a problem that you're facing with your spouse, marriage counseling is the way to go. Don't be afraid of booking even one session to work through an issue in which you feel stuck at home. One scenario to consider this form of help is when you have concerns about a friend of your spouse's. For example, you may be nervous that the friend is a bad influence on your spouse. Maybe the friend has bad habits such as using drugs, or doesn't like you and may pull your spouse away from you. Whatever the case, here are some things that you can address in family therapy.
A Chance To Explain Your Fear
Often, fear is at the root of what is upsetting you in such a scenario, and fear can sometimes be difficult to express. In counseling, your marriage therapist will allow you to explain what is bothering you, and you can use this opportunity to make your spouse understand what your fears are. For example, if your spouse's friend is a drug user and heavy drinker, your core fear may be that your spouse begins to engage in these behaviors, too, which you feel will be detrimental to the health of your relationship.
An Opportunity To Hear Your Spouse's Perspective
Once you've outlined why the situation is bothering you, your spouse will have a chance to respond. Your marriage counselor will help your spouse to do so without being defensive — outside of a counseling environment, it would be easy for the spouse to take offense to your concerns, rather than really try to understand them. Ideally, your spouse will acknowledge that he or she understands what you're saying and may also talk about how he or she views this friend and the negative habits in question.
A Chance To Come To A Consensus
You and your spouse will then be able to talk about how you both want to proceed. There are many potential outcomes. Your spouse could start to limit contact with this friend because he or she, too, is concerned about these behaviors. Or, the spouse may decide to remain friends but affirm to you that he or she won't let these behaviors rub off. Your goal is to come up with an outcome that you both are happy with and that feels authentic — something that is often easy to accomplish in a marriage counselor's office.Share